“I am my own worst enemy. I have a lot of demons and they’re still there. I still battle with them. But I’ve always had those values in the back of my head. Even though I’ve done horrible, horrible things to myself and other people, it’s not like I don’t feel bad. When I died I was sober for a while. I was doing good. And then I was getting getting tattooed. I was getting the heart tattooed on my chest saying Capulet and it’s the sacred heart from Romeo and Juliet on Tybalt’s chest. So I wanted that one. And I was like ‘yeah, ok it’s gonna hurt so I should so I should take something.
So I took a few oxycontin. Then I was getting anxiety so I took a few xanax. And then smoke some weed and then I think I drank some GHB. And then I woke up a day or two later in the hospital. There was no light. I didn’t see any light. No one spoke to me. I didn’t have some apparition or whatever. I woke up like ‘why are there tubes in me? What’s going on?’ And my brother just told me and the doctor pointed his finger at me and told me I screwed up.”